finish

I am great at starting projects - a real master. When it comes to following through and finishing, not so much.

It's not so much that I lose interest, once I fall in love with an idea I rarely fall out of love, it's more that I get scared, afraid I'll fail, so it's easier to put down the project rather than do the hard work of seeing it through to the end.

Maybe I don't have all that much confidence in my abilities.

BUT, I have decided to change that aspect of my personality. I am going to focus on a project that's been rumbling around in my head for several years now - a book.

It's based on an idea I got when I was working for the Carmel Heritage Society. A group of women in their 80s who had gone to school together would meet once a month to reminisce about their childhoods in Carmel and talk about what had happened in their lives as adults. One of those women had a particularly fascinating story which spawned an idea for a book.

I've done quite a lot of research already. Frankly, as much as I enjoy writing (and I do love it!) I'm actually much fonder of research and that's usually where I get stuck. It's way more fun to research than it is to organize everything and actually put it to paper in a concise manner. MUCH more fun.

However, the time has come to fish or cut bait, so to speak, and I'm going to finally write that book!

To that end, I'm going to be guided by the words of author Laura Bradbury who had a similar non-finishing problem of her own until a near fatal illness made her realize that time was not her friend and it was time to do what she'd always wanted to do:

1) Pick ONE thing you want to finish. A creative project? A life project? An emotional project? If you put pressure on yourself to finish everything you’re going to fail. Just pick one thing. 

Ok, so I've picked my book project. I have other book ideas but I'm going to commit to this single one until it's finished. Yes indeedy.

2) Once you have that thing, figure out a plan for finishing it - Break the work into reasonable increments and most importantly make a commitment to yourself to NOT jump to another project until you finish this thing. 

The first step will be to compile all my previously done research into one place. I have it on computers and in notebooks right now. Luckily I was smart enough to bring it all to Florida and not leave it behind in storage in California the way some of my other research projects are.

Second step will be to fill in the gaps in my research. There are a couple of road trips that need to be taken - one to Georgia and one to the middle of nowhere Texas. I'm really looking forward to Texas but I would prefer not to do it alone so I'm going to have to find a road trip buddy. Anybody up for an exciting adventure?

And then comes the hard part - actually writing the first draft. Luckily I've already begun the outline of the story so it's just a matter of filling in the details. And I have to keep in mind that you can always edit crap but you can't edit a blank page.

3) Expect it to be hard and feel gross. Resistance is real folks, but it helps if we can anticipate it and fully expect the finishing part to feel unnatural and difficult and just YUCK. The key is to recognize you have to experience the yuck in order to get through it and reach The End.

Yep, I imagine it will get difficult and the old me will want to put it down and do something fun but that's one of the reasons I'm putting this out here - to make myself accountable for finishing.

4) Pick an enticing reward for yourself when you’re done. I do this with every book - usually it’s a pair of shoes I’ve been coveting, The key is the delayed satisfaction of something you truly want. Post a photo of it somewhere visible to keep you slogging when the going gets tough. 

This step is harder for me because any enticing reward is going to cost money that I don't have so I can't even imagine what to pick.

5) Remember that you’re gonna die. I know this sounds harsh, but being alive is a terminal condition for all of us. Trust me, when you face the end of your life (I’ve been there) you’re going to feel unhappy that you didn’t go out and create those things or change those things or do those things you dreamed of. Whenever your motivation wanes, remind yourself that you too are heading to the terminal on this bus of life.

Kind of morbid but the one thing that the last 9 months has taught me is that life is way shorter than 20 year old me ever imagined it would be. I want to do something that I can be proud of and this is what I'm choosing to do.

So wish me luck. I'll share more of what I'm doing in the coming months. Right now I still want to hug the storyline to myself.