Honeymoon!

 

Our honeymoon was absolutely perfect!

It wasn't long - only 3 days - but it was magical from start to finish.

I found a 'buy one get one free' deal on a new-ish cruiseline, Margaritaville at Sea, and found that we could both cruise in an oceanview stateroom for less than $200 which is cheaper than a room at the beach so I jumped on it and booked it in June.

Then life came along and it looked like we might not even be able to go because Chris's ex-wife no longer has transportation (her engine is busted and she can't afford to get a new one) so Chris has to pick the kids up from her house on the days she has then and take them to school and then bring them back to her again. If he didn't do this, her solution is to just keep them home and have them miss school.

We had carefully planned our few days away for Wednesday, Thursday and Friday because those are her days and in June, we had no idea this car issue would come up. Even in August, when school started up again, we had no idea we'd still be dealing with this in November but we quickly realized we couldn't leave town and let the kids miss school.

Luckily we have a great friend who offered to be transportation for the kids on those days so we still got our little time away.

We drove to the port on Wednesday morning just as soon as we dropped the kids off at school. You're allowed to board the ship around 12 and we arrived at 1 which was perfect because there were no lines and we walked right on.

It's an older ship but it's beautifully maintained and it has cute decor with a Jimmy Buffet/Parrothead theme. I feel like it was the perfect size for a short cruise and easy to navigate.

The first thing we did was sign up for the unlimited soda package and the 10 alcoholic drink package because we knew we really wanted to unwind and have a good time. The soda package gives you a shark or alligator cup and we purchased a "blender" cup for fun. The whole Blender thing comes from a Jimmy Buffet song that says "there's booze in the blender, and soon it will render, that frozen concoction that helps me hang on." It's going to be a cute souvenir and we can bring it back for future cruises and get discounted refills.

Our room was very nice, spacious for a cruise ship, and had a big round window so that we could see the ocean. The bathroom was cute and had the tiniest shower which could only hold 1 person at a time. There was a TV but we never watched it.

The food was awesome and plentiful. We spent a lot of time at the buffet which had plenty of yummy choices for breakfast, lunch and dinner although the first night we ate at the restaurant because they had escargot for an appetizer and I LOVE escargot. Chris was less than enchanted by the little snails even though I assured him it tasted like butter and garlic and there's nothing bad about that.

But the buffet kept us coming back especially since we chose to sit out on the back deck of the buffet for the amazing view...and the fact that the bar was right there.

The shows were great, the sing a long piano bar was so much fun we did it both nights, the comedian was hilarious and he even made us part of his act. There was always something to do or live music to listen to each evening.

The ship docked in Freeport, Bahamas the next morning but we didn't have enough money to book an excursion so we decided to enjoy the quiet, almost empty ship and it was so relaxing. We took a couple of naps in the room (we were honeymooning, after all) and a couple up on the pool deck just enjoying the perfect weather in the Bahamas.

We roamed all over the ship and took pictures of the two of us and then we ate some more and took in another night of shows.

I know I had a lot of complaints about the wedding reception but I have not a single complaint about the honeymoon because it was (and I know I've already used these words a lot) absolutely perfect, simply amazing and wonderfully magical.

I'm sharing a picture of my breakfast the last morning because it was my favorite - bagel and cream cheese with smoked salmon (lox) with the new addition of smashed avocado. Simply scrumptious!

We disembarked on Friday morning after having to hang out on the pool deck some more because there was a back up at Customs. What a pity, we got to relax in one of those comfy couch-chairs for two while waiting. Finally they called us and we had to wait in line a bit but finally got through. Next time I'll know to get an Express Pass so that we can get off the ship earlier but then again, who wants to leave Paradise any earlier than you have to?

What a way to start our married life!

Bad...Ugly

 

And now for the Bad - what went wrong

I'm going to try to keep this as short as possible because I know that some of this would hurt peoples' feelings if they ever read it so I'm not going into detail.

1. People. There were a lot of people who should have been there and weren't. Chris's entire family was invited over a year ago and just a few months ago were talking enthusiastically about coming but a few weeks before they all came up with various excuses and said they weren't coming. I'm sure they weren't looking forward to the long drive (I know how long it is, we've driven up there twice in a year to see them) but it's not any longer than my family had to drive. I felt so bad for Chris, it really sucks and I can't help being angry about how they hurt him.

His own son couldn't make it a priority to come even though he too had been making plans just a few months ago. That one killed him and caused him to break down during the ceremony; I'm going to have trouble getting over it.

It wasn't just his family, friends of his that he invited, that said they were coming just a day before, didn't bother to show up or even let us know. 

2. Food. On the other hand, it's probably good that we had small numbers because we really didn't have enough food. I'm going to take part of the blame for this insomuch as I should have seen it coming and had a backup plan in place. But having a backup plan says that I didn't trust someone to come through for us and I didn't want to do that to them. It's not like there was no food, no one starved, but there would have been more if there had been better time management and planning.

3. Makeup and Hair. Right from the beginning I knew I wanted to get my makeup and hair professionally done but things happened, people backed out and I didn't want to burden anybody with helping me so I did it myself. I'm ok with the makeup and not getting lashes but I really wish I'd been able to get my hair done. Luckily my family kept telling me I looked beautiful and I felt good about myself so I was fine on the day and I don't hate the way I look in the pictures. Not that we have very many of them because...

4. Pictures. There are so many pictures we didn't get, so many moments that are lost forever. We were never going to be able to afford a professional photographer but someone in Chris's extended family agreed to use our camera to take the pictures but didn't show up and never texted/called to say they weren't coming but rather let us find out through the grapevine. I wasn't surprised, I had my doubts about this person, but I was disappointed especially for Chris who thought this person cared about him. There was a backup plan, I was assured I would still get pictures but that fell apart too.

5. First Dance. We didn't have one even though I'd picked out a song. The reception needed more organization, I was too busy fixing things that hadn't been set up correctly and time got away from us.

6. Cake. I really wanted a pretty wedding cake, I even had one picked out from Publix that was perfect with our theme but, as with the food, ordering that cake would have upset someone that said they wanted to make a cake for us so I didn't pursue it. The cake arrived so late that everyone had already gone home and we had packed everything up plus it was in real danger of toppling over so I didn't feel comfortable cutting into it and we couldn't anyway because the knife had already been packed away in our cars. The design would have been cute with more time and attention. I guess I needn't have worried that Chris would smash cake in my face. LOL But I really like cake so I regret not having one and I feel bad that our guests didn't get cake. Plus I had this custom cake topper made and it never even got out of the box. I think I might order a small cake in the design that I love for our 1 month anniversary so that I can use my cake topper.

The Ugly - what we don't talk about

The cake thing was the last straw and I ended the reception in tears. I had to go take a walk around the deck away from people just to compose myself. The good thing about that is I got a chance to see all our Nightmare Before Christmas inflatables set up out there along with the 10 foot tall Grim Reaper (I have named him Reapy) that had greeted all our guests. 

We also had these cute glass jack-o-lanterns that lined the railing and Chris lit the candles as soon as it got dark. I hadn't seen any of this because I was being kept out of sight until the ceremony started and of course I don't have pictures of any of this. It really looked magical out there and that calmed me down a bit so at least I could go back inside and not have my family ask me what was wrong a million times; they only asked half a million because anyone could see I was pretty upset. My sister was so sad that I was sad and it was a sucky way to end the evening.

The things that went wrong are things I didn't take charge of, I sat back and took people at their word and trusted them. I'm really not a control freak and didn't want to be a bridezilla but now I can see why that kind of behavior happens.

However, now that I've written it out, I can let it go. None of it prevented us from getting married and since the people that showed up are the ones that really care about us, they aren't going to judge or hold it against us. 

We have a shelf in our living room that holds some of the wedding items just to remind us of that special day. I smile when I look at it and I'm only carrying around the happy memories.

Good...

 

Here it is - my wedding recap...with a nod to a famous Clint Eastwood (former mayor of my beloved Carmel) movie.

The Good - what went right

    I certainly want to start with the positives because there are a lot of them.

1. We got married! Isn't that the whole point? Everything else that happens at a wedding is just icing on the cake...oh dear, don't get me started on cake.

2. The ceremony was perfect. It went exactly as I'd planned, Chris got emotional and told me I was beautiful. We had family surrounding us and friends witnessing the moment.

3. The Sand Ceremony. We got a bunch of different colored sand and got all the kids (grown, littles and grandson) and us to pour it into a container at the same time. The results are more beautiful than I could have imagined. The song Step By Step by Brandon Davis was playing and I took the opportunity to tell all of them that I loved them and would be there for them always. The container was an owl that Chris found and wanted to use for the sand because my late sister collected glass owls and he wanted her to be represented at the wedding which was so sweet of him.

4. The Music. I did a damn good job putting together all the playlists which made it easy for our friend Sean to help us out by playing just the right song at just the right time. I loved all the songs we walked down the aisle to and then we had 3 straight hours of Halloween/dancing music. At a certain point in the reception the song 'Somebody's Watching Me' came on and Cadence grabbed my hand so we could go out on the deck to dance to it because we are always singing that song at home. That's a sweet memory that will live in my heart forever.

5. The Venue! OMG I love, love, love that Train Depot venue. It was PERFECT for our group and gave us a lovely ceremony space. I hope to have all my parties there for the rest of my life, it was beautiful and private and amazing. It was the perfect choice.

6. Our decor. We spent a lot of time and most of our limited budget picking up spooky decor and it looked perfect in the space. Poor Chris did most of the decorating by himself because the people that were supposed to help him backed out and he did a phenomenal job. It wasn't easy lugging several storage totes up those stairs (especially with his knee injury) and then trying to figure out how I wanted it set up. He had insisted that we not see each other on the wedding day so I know it added stress to him to have to do it on his own. It definitely stressed me out now being able to help and, let's face it, control everything...and I'm not even a control freak. He did great.

These are the plates we used with matching tumblers for the drinks and we asked everyone to take them home as a favor from our wedding. Since so many people didn't show up we have many plates leftover so we'll just use them for our annual Halloween/Anniversary parties.

7. My family. I can't even begin to express how much I love my family and how special they were during this wedding. They had been there supporting us from the beginning of our relationship and they were so excited about coming to the wedding. It's a 7 hour drive from Alabama to where we live but they never wavered in their determination to come and they arrived on Thursday afternoon and stayed until Sunday morning. We got to spend a lot of time with them and they gave Cadence and I a place to spend Friday night because Chris didn't want us to see each other until the ceremony and Cadence wanted to stay with me. I love each one of them and it means the world to me that they went out of their way, drove 7+ hours, to be there for us.

They rented this amazing vacation house here in town, just a couple of miles from where we live, and that became our home base for the weekend. They arrived in town on Thursday afternoon and ordered pizzas for all of us for dinner. 

The next day while my sister in law, sister and I went to get our nails done, Chris made lasagna which we all had for dinner Friday night. Cadence and I spent the night on Friday (it was a 4 bedroom house with an amazing kitchen) and then we all went out to lunch on Saturday. It was the most time I'd been able to spend with my family in years. My brother (he was married to my older sister before I was even born) gave me away and did a wonderful job. Both he and my brother in law (married to my sister/niece) put a lot of thought into their costumes (it was a Halloween party after all) and it all made me feel so special. My new sister in law, she and my brother are newlyweds themselves, is an ordained minister so she did our ceremony and made it so personal and special. My sister (who is technically my niece but we grew up together so we're sisters) is my rock, my best friend, my most favoritest person in the world (after Chris) and my biggest supporter. I felt her love every moment of the wedding weekend and she looked so beautiful in her lavender dress. Nothing would have been the same without her. However, I have to give a big shoutout to her husband (who I've known for 35 years now) because he rocked it down the aisle as my Bubble Dude. He danced and pranced just like I wanted him to. It made me laugh and I've only seen it from the backside since I was hiding in the wings when he went out.

They are my people and I wouldn't have made it through the last 4 years without them so having them at our wedding was everything.

8. Our friends. We invited over 60 people and probably less than 20 showed up and that includes my family. I have feelings about the ones that didn't bother to make it but I will always be grateful for the ones that did, the ones that took time out of their weekend to be there with us. We had a great time with our friends. My boss and her daughter were there all the way from Orlando. She doesn't like going to new places so the fact that she came all that way and drove home in the dark means a lot. Chris's boss was there with his wife and kids, we love them. A former co-worker of Chris's came early with his fiancee to help Chris when the setting up process started to overwhelm him and some new friends were there who I hope will be a big part of our lives in the future. My favorite guests were the 3 ladies that Chris transports at 5am every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. They've formed a bond with Chris on those early morning rides so it was important to me that they were there and they looked like they were having a fabulous time. They entered into the spirit and came in costume and I loved meeting them and talking with them. Chris's oldest daughter was there with her boyfriend and our grandson and that was wonderful. They've been on the road truckers for the past few months so it was the first time we'd seen them since June. I wish Chris could have had all his kids there (his oldest son chose not to come which caused some tears on the wedding day) but we cherish the ones that made the effort...although I guess the 10 year old and 8 year old really didn't have a choice. Luckily they had a great day running and playing with some of the other kids.

9. My Charlie. And last but definitely not least - my flower girl was none other than our dog Charlie. She looked adorable in her little flower girl dress (which I'd had for years) and her pearl leash. She walked down the aisle with my 10 year old daughter and made her presence known by barking at the beginning of the ceremony but she settled down and was an angel the rest of the night. When I'd sit down at the reception she would take a nap on the train of my dress.

I will remember our wedding day with fondness because of all that went right.

But there's always a few things that are epic fails so next up:

The Bad - what went wrong