change

 

i went online just a little while ago to check on my mortgage account and it says it's "inactive" which means it's been paid off and i no longer have that obligation.

sweet!

after paying that mortgage for over 20 years along with a rent payment for whatever california house we were living in at the time, it's amazing and weird to not have that hanging over my head anymore. of course the downside is that i also no longer have access to the house. lol

but it also means that i've finally achieved something i wanted for a very long time - i'm unencumbered and fancy free. i could grab charlie, jump in the car and head west or north and be a free spirit blowing in the wind, heading wherever the road takes me...and i could do it for a very long while until the money runs out. not the smartest thing to do, i admit, but today it's very tempting.

i find myself questioning a lot of things lately. i'm having trust issues, sitting back watching a situation develop to see where it goes knowing that either everything will be fine or i'll be starting over yet again but at least this time i'll have taz's last gift to me cushioning the blow.

stay tuned, things are going to change one way or another.