dreaming

Last night I woke up around 2am and couldn't get back to sleep because of pain. I was so tense and scrunched up during the last week my boarder was here, I pulled a muscle somewhere between my shoulder blade and left boob and it's healing VERY SLOWLY. It feels like it needs to be stretched out. I have a feeling I know what would stretch it and get rid of that lingering tension but that's not happening anytime soon so I decided to try sleeping on the couch.

To be honest, my 19 year old mattress is not all that comfortable anymore, I can feel all the coils in it, but I don't have the money to replace it (and any money I do have is going towards new tires and fixing the "check engine" light on my car) so my couch is actually more comfortable than my bed.

Taz used to suffer from insomnia at times and whenever he'd wake up in the middle of the night and didn't want to disturb me, he'd trot off to the couch and it always seemed to work because I'd find him sound asleep the next morning.

Maybe I was surrounded by his spirit last night because I was able to find a comfortable position on the couch and slipped back off to sleep pretty quickly where I had the most amazing dream.

I dreamed that I woke up to find Taz in bed with me, seemingly asleep. Then he woke up and that in itself was a wonderful feeling. I was too stunned to say anything at first but Charlie went wild, kissing him all over and he was laughing. Then I found my voice and I had to tell him about what had happened. He seemed pretty cool about the whole "you've been dead for over 7 months" thing, like it was no big deal and he was glad to be there now.

Then we got up and started walking around outside while I told him about all the things that had changed in the world while he'd been gone.

It was a very vivid dream, I don't get those very often, and I just felt surprised and grateful to have him back. It felt very real to be talking with him although I really don't remember any of the conversation. It wasn't like he was giving me advice about life or anything. We were just hanging out. I really, really miss just hanging out.

I woke up while we were still walking and talking so I didn't have to say goodbye. I wasn't sad when I woke up and knew that it had only been a dream. I just felt grateful to get the chance to spend time with him again.

Weird, right? But nice.