Threesomes never really work out.
Oh get your mind out of the gutter, I'm not talking about the "adult" version of a threesome. I have absolutely no experience with that. At risk of exposing my naivete, I'm not even sure how the mechanics of it would work. If anybody out there would like to explain it to me...well, never mind, I'm getting off track.
I'm talking about friendships among 3 girls or 3 women. I've been part of several threesome friendships over my lifetime. There are usually 3 distinct roles within the friendship. It usually starts with 2 best friends and then a newcomer gets introduced into the mix in one way or another. One of the best friends usually gets stuck in the middle while the other one sometimes experiences jealousy at having to make room in the friendship for a new person. And the newcomer usually ends up feeling like a third wheel at least some of the time.
I've been in each of those positions throughout the years and they've each produced hurt. Right now, within my group of friends, I'm the newcomer.
I've actually been surprised at how well we've been navigating the threesome world. We have so much fun together and I can't imagine my life without these girls but still, every once in a while, I can see little bits of strain.
The other night one of my friends texted me to say she was going over to our other friend's house. For a brief second I actually thought she was going to ask me if I wanted to come over too. It wasn't like I was even going to say yes. That was the night I was going to re-blonde my hair (oh did I spoil an illusion that it's my natural color? LOL) and couldn't go out, so why did it hurt just a little when there was no such request?
It's silly, of course, and doesn't affect our friendship, it just took me by surprise and reminded me how much I treasure my friendships even when they are complicated.
But it also made me aware that I can't stop trying to meet new friends. I've been going out to a few of those social events lately and they seem to be getting easier. At least I don't run away before they even begin anymore. Not that I've met my new best friend or anything even close but I have had some laughs and it keeps me busy and distracted and I think that's the best I can hope for right now.
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