cherished

You know what would have been nice during this whole hurricane thing? Having someone call me and tell me they were coming to ride out the storm with me and help me with the prep, because the yard stuff is a bit overwhelming.

Don't get me wrong, I didn't for even one second entertain the notion that it would ever happen; I knew it wouldn't. But it sure would have been nice to feel that anybody on this earth actually cared enough to think about it.

I used to be cherished. You know what Taz did once? We were living in California and I was going to be singing a solo in an upcoming concert with my chorus. He was going to be away on the East Coast for 2 weeks for important business so he was going to have to stay there for the weekend and would miss my solo. It would have been too hard to fly 6 hours home and then turn around the next day and do another 6 back to the east.

I was ok with it, I really was and even if I hadn't been, I NEVER would have told him so. I didn't want him to be the least bit distracted for his meetings so it was no big deal. 

However, he surprised me (totally) by arranging to fly back home on Saturday afternoon, attend my concert and then fly back Sunday morning. He had considered just showing up at the concert unannounced but decided that might throw me off and mess up my solo so he came to our house a few hours before so that I could get over my shock. I was SO surprised and shocked and thrilled. All of my fellow chorus members were pretty surprised to see him there too because they'd known he was away and felt bad that I wouldn't have anybody in the audience for my big moment.

That made me feel cherished beyond belief and I never forgot it. I was forever grateful that he had put himself out that way and thought about it on his own, knowing that I would much rather have him out in the audience than 3000 miles away. He actually said that he never, not for one minute, considered not being there. That meant more to me than just about anything he did for me over the years.

Taz wasn't a big romantic and these types of events were few and far between but for over 3 decades I always knew I was important to someone on this earth and now I'm not and probably never will be again and that makes my heart hurt in ways I never knew it could.